Autor: Cătălina Stan

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„Imagine all the People”

Humanity is not dead

Dear Readers,

I’ve often talked about people, since a lot of people have had a great impact over my life. But, to be honest, I’ve been in a love-hate relationship with them since the beginning of my times. The numerous times I wanted to be in the middle of them, enjoying their company… But there were even more times when I wanted to run away from them, as far as possible, preferably in the middle of nowhere.

We like to talk about people a lot. We like to put them in categories. We like to catalog them. We like to compare them. We like to do all sorts of things to them. Every new person that we meet is checked inside and out until there is no mystery left of them. And we will meet hundreds of people in our lifetime. If we are lucky or unlucky,( if you prefer), we will meet thousands of them… Thousands of people that we will catalog, we will edit them and save them in our memories. read more

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„Nothing satisfies me but your soul”

Chess board players

Dear Readers,

Today I am going to tell you a story. It is inspired from a song by Jen Titus that a I heard a long time ago in the TV show „Supernatural”. A few lyrics from this song are borrowed. Also, the inspiration comes from the hundreds of minutes of surreal dreams that I’ve been having ever since I’ve lost my sight. Sometimes, I believe that my brain is mismatching reality with an imaginary world with fabulous castles, kings and queens, wars, heroes and adventures. I should add that I remembered about an old photo album posted on Facebook, with photos of a medieval-like complete set of chess pieces. These photos, which I can perfectly visualize, are a source of inspiration as well. These photos will be added in future parts as time and imagination will allow us to. Sis is the one helping me put these ideas into proper English. read more

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My Brain vs. The Computer and The OS

Replica of Zuse Z3, the first fully automated analog computer

Dear Readers,

Ever since my brain was damaged, I became very interested in how this „pretty” organ works and how mine is working, in particular. In nearly all articles that were read to me, the brain is often compared to a computer and unanimously described as an electric network. If this is the case, everyone of us owns a very powerful computer without even knowing. All sorts of associations between my damaged brain and a computer/ an OS come to mind.

If my brain is a computer, then I’m functioning on a Pentium 1 Processor, with 126 MB RAM, with no graphic card and broken sound card. The default OS is Windows 98. read more

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Sunt la 2m de margine și mă gândesc…

My version of six feet from the edge

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„Sunt la doi metri de margine și mă gândesc că poate doi metri nu înseamnă chiar atât de mult în jos.”

Există momente în viață când treci prin evenimente care te fac, la propriu, să simți că tocmai ai lovit pământul. Am descris odată acest sentiment ca și cum viața te-ar lovi puternic în fund și te-ar împinge de pe acoperișul unei clădiri turn. Deși nu poți opri cădere, iar alta nu poți face decât a aștepta să lovești pământul, nu poți nici să nu auzi vocea vieții râzând în spatele tău și spunându-ți: „Prostule!” Uneori ai zăcea acolo, pe trotuar, spart în mii de bucăți, dezintegrat. read more

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„6 Ft from the Edge”

My version of six feet from the edge

Dear Readers,

„I’m six feet from the edge and I’m thinking that maybe six feet ain’t so far down”. There are times in life when you go through events that make you, quite literally, feel like you just hit the ground. I once described this feeling as if life kicks you in the butt so hard and pushes you off a tower building. While you can’t stop the fall and wait to hit the ground, you can’t also stop hearing life’s voice laughing behind your back and telling you: „You fool!” Sometimes you would lay there on the pavement, broken into thousands of pieces, disintegrated. read more

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May I Serve You Some True Blood, Ma’am?

Fooling around with grapefruit juice after finishing True Blood

Dear Readers,

(The Big Red Haired Fox, Ana, keeps telling me that the blog gets more hits and visitors each month, so, I am upping the formula to readers and will talk to you as a whole from now on. Do not feel depersonalized on me now, I care about each one of you, especially if you are not a hit and runner.)

The idea of writing about the thick blood issue was seeded in my mind a while ago, but decided to hear another doctor’s opinion on the matter, before posting something. This last doctor confirmed some of my beliefs. read more

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The Road to Perdition (to Bucharest)

Catalina, T. and M. at JIKO Clinic, Bucharest

Dear Reader,

I named this post as I did because last time I was in Bucharest I nearly lost my life. As you can imagine, I am now in the city with my sister and my mom for more tests, procedures and alternative therapy. It doesn’t feel like perdition any longer, but I still have time to change my mind about that thought. Hopefully not (added later: I haven’t changed my mind).

For a while now, my family and I have been thinking about finding better and more open minded doctors to help my case. However, a trip to Bucharest would have been difficult. Through a strange chain of events, a person we haven’t heard of in 18 years (his name is T.) showed up out of the blue and offered to help. For a few weeks, I kept changing my mind about this trip ( I believe I was very scared). But then, more help was offered, all stars were aligned and I was forcefully dragged out of my beloved bed I was glued to for the last 10 months, to come to Bucharest. read more

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„A song that no one sings”

Dear Reader,

Do you know what the word „vermillion” means? It is a word I a first heard about nine years ago, in a song „Vermillion Pt.2.0”, by Slipknot, but I was never interested in finding out what it means. Until this morning, when I asked The Big Red Head Fox ( Ana) to tell me the definition.

Vermillion is an alternative writing for the word vermilion.

vermilion= a brilliant red pigment made from cinnabar (mercury sulphide)(Oxford Dictionary)

origin. It comes from the Old French word „vermellion”, which was derived from „vermeil”from the Latin word „vermilculus”,the diminutive form of the word „vermis” (worm).The name originated from this word  because the color is similar to the natural dye made by an insect, Kermes vermilio. read more

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Un cântec pe care nimeni nu îl cântă

Dragă cititorule,

Știi ce înseamnă cuvântul „vermillion”? Este un cuvânt pe care l-am auzit prima dată acum aproximativ nouă ani, într-o piesă „Vermillion Pt.2.0” de la Slipknot, dar nu am fost niciodată interesată să aflu ce înseamnă. Până în această dimineață, când am rugat-o pe The Big Red Head Fox (Ana) să-mi spună definiția.

Vermillion este o scriere alternativă pentru cuvântul vermilion.

vermilion = un pigment roșu strălucitor obținut din cinabru (sulfură de mercur) (Dicționar Oxford) read more

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Dar îmi place când mă învârt în strânsoarea sa

Massive Attack - Heligoland

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Voi începe ideea de „Stuck on Replay” cu o melodie de la Massive Attack, „Paradise Circus”, pe care o puteți asculta mai jos.

Ai fost vreodată atât de obsedat de o melodie, încât nu o poți scoate din minte? În cazul meu, „Paradise Circus” a fost doar o ceașcă de ceai timp de aproximativ 5 ani, când am ascultat-o ​​prima dată la Radio Guerrilla, La Unica Radio con Cojones. Așa că voi fi foarte entuziasmată cu cuvintele mele de laudă. Și, promit, este singura dată când voi face asta. read more

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